【維吉爾傳-II】《維吉爾，一位窮賤但想讀醫的人》: 命運的咽喉(下)
完成了所有測試後，我回到輪候大堂，Brother Cox微笑道：「How was it, young man?」
「Lied to me, old man. The penatration in colon hurt so much!」：我嘆道
「Maybe your love for her isn't en…enough! Who did you think…think of during that moment?」
「Never tell you I will.」：我有氣無力地說。
Brother Cox拿出自己的電話，說道：「The director guy just re…replied me, look what he said, young man.」
螢幕上顯示的是一封電子郵件，上面寫道：「The admission office certainly encourages all applicants to submit their application on time. However, if there really are members trying to get in, we welcome them to go on hand in everything they have no matter what. Since the amount of students from Macau is very small, we look forward to seeing more Macanese members apply.」
什麼？！......
我驚訝地看著這封電子郵件，說道：「Which means…」
Brother用力地拍了拍我的肩膀，說：「Which means the answer is a “Yes”! You still…still stand a chance if you submit all info, documents and essays before the fin…final deadline, sir!」
什麼?!你說的一切都是真的嗎?!即使國際學生截止申請日已過，我還可以繼續申請?!我還有機會進大學?怎麼可能啊?我真的不是在做夢嗎?
「Thank you so so much!」我感激涕零地對Brother Cox說道：「I can’t even it’s happening to me! I don’t know what to say. I just…」
「I just can’t thank you enough!」：我感動地說道
原來這個世界真的會有奇蹟!奇蹟真的會發生在我身上!
「……請到4號診室。」：大堂的廣播器叫到了我的名字。
我收起興奮的笑容，說道：「It’s my turn.」
Brother Cox指了指自己的手機螢幕，再指了指診室的方向，說道：「One by one, we’ll get all your problems solved. You won’t give up on yourself, but…but pull yourself up and fight like an lion, Vergil!」
我點頭說：「No falling back.」
原本我以為已關上了的入學之門居然被Brother Cox一下打開了!有他替我打了這支強心針後，我面對自己的疾病也沒有那麼先前那麼緊張和焦慮了。我鼓起勇氣，在Brother Cox的陪伴下走進診室。
醫生研究著我剛才接受檢查所得出的超聲波影像、內窺鏡影像和排洩物分析報告，然後說道：「先生你才二十歲，對吧?」
「對。」：我淡然道
醫生看完那些影像和報告後便將其放到我面前，說：「你也說過自己不煙不酒不毒，而且你才那麼年輕。」
醫生說粵語Brother Cox自然聽不懂，所以他在發著呆沒事做。但醫生一放下那些分析報告到他面前後，Brother Cox便立即認真起來，瞪大眼看著那些圖像和我完全看不懂的尿液及糞便分析報告。他那專注的眼神在一絲不苟地分析著報告上每一道細節，我畢生中從未見過這位柏金遜老人如此全神貫注的樣子。
醫生不知道Brother Cox是洛衫磯最有名的泌尿科權威醫生之一，大概只當他是位不知哪裡來的好奇的老頭，所以沒有管他，只是繼續對我說：「檢查的結果出來了，你可以完全放心。你的膀胱、前列腺和腎都完好無缺，尿液和糞便分析所得的結果也顯示出你的身體中並無任何病毒感染或是發炎。」
Brother Cox分析著我排洩系統相關器官的超聲波影像，醫生沒理他，續道：「便秘可以是由飲食習慣或是壓力產生的。現在都看到器官完全正常了，所以排尿的困難可能是由於尿道裡有點緊張，我可以些相應的藥給你舒緩一下那症狀。」
「好，謝謝醫生。」：我禮貌道
「Done, sir.」：我對Brother Cox低聲道。
我取過藥單便和Brother Cox站起身離開。離開診室後，我便對手拿著分析報告的Brother Cox問道：「Did you see anything, Doctor Cox?」
「Every organ of your reproductive system is perfectly fine and your urinalysis report shows normal index,」Brother Cox問道：「What did the doctor say about you just now?」
「He said my difficulty in urination is caused by some kind of uh…muscle tension in urethra.」：我答道
「Tension? Do you feel uncomfortable during your urination or once you’ve started the initial urine stream, it’s completely fine?」：Brother Cox問道
我答道：「No, not all at. Once I could start the stream, everything’s fine. The urine flow is very normal, it isn’t particularly small or blocked or anything.」
「Well, that means your urethra can’t be blocked or narrowed. How could the doctor just guess you have tension in urethra?」：Brother Cox答道
Brother Cox問道：「So I have a question. Do you feel anxious or worried when urinating?」
我答道：「Yeah I do. I do feel very nervous every time.」
Brother Cox續問道：「I know that you’ve been going through a lot…lot of challenges and even heart-breaking moments recently. Do you feel very frustrated, depressed or stressed?」
「More than stress,」我嘆道：「Every single day I felt tortured by those burdens.」
「Wait a moment.」：我對Brother Cox說，然後走到領藥處取過自己的藥。
再回到Brother Cox面前，他用震顫的手指著自己的腦袋說：「And then I think problem isn’t physical, but psychological!」
「When a human takes too much stress, more than he can…can handle, some parts of his body can go wrong,」Brother Cox說道：「Your psychologi…gical stress could affect your nervous system, when the transmition of signals to your bladder or urethra is interfered or delayed, urinary symptoms will happen in your body.」
我恍然大悟道：「I’m no doctor, I’ve never thought of that…」
「I may not have much in my…my life but I don’t lack doctor friends,」Brother Cox說道：「I have a friend in Hong Kong and he’s an expert on this subject. Would you mind if I give…give your number to him and let him call you?」
「Of course not! That’ll be the best!」：我感激道
Brother Cox看著我手上的藥，說道：「These pills are for treating prostate enlargement and releasing tension in urethra. The ultrasound scan already shows that your prostate gland is normal, why did the doc…doctor still give you these?」
「I don’t know…」：我苦笑說
Brother Cox比起我看過的所有醫生都對病情發問得更深入細節，分析得更詳細，而不是像平時的醫生那樣聽幾句就直接開藥給我。經過這次事件後，我深深認識到普通醫生和權威醫生的分別所在。
「Do you need help with your essays? Sister Cox is a nurse, but she actually studied literature before going to a nurse school. I’m sure she can give you many ideas for writing.」：Brother Cox說道
「Yeah, that’ll be really great!」：我驚喜道
......
三日後 晚上十一時
「Soonly after? Well actually “soonly” isn’t a word, we don’t know why so many people say it.」：Sister Cox笑說
「I’ll change it to “shortly”, poor gramaar, sorry.」：我不好意思地答道
「If you use “Got nothing” in that sentence, it sounds quite casual while you’re writing an essay. I’d suggest you to change it into a more formal expression, such as “Found no success”.」：Sister Cox續道
「Okay,」我在最後續寫：「I want to study in a small class so that I can interact with the professor and get more instructions from him, which could help me learn better.」
「Well you pointed out a really good point!」Sister Cox讚道：「If I were you, I’d even rephrase the sentence to make it more persuative.」
「Oh really? How?」：我問道
Sister Cox微笑說：「I’d rephrase “Learn better” to “I will not only be able to build a better friendship with my teacher, but also deepen my understand of the academic contents.”」
Sister Cox果然是位具有真材實料的英國文學系畢業生啊，用字精闢，簡單兩句句子的含金量比我寫的整段還多。
Sister Cox呼了一口氣說：「I've read your essay for more than 5 times, maybe when Brother Cox has a look, he can see something different.」
「Su...sure, take a rest, Sister Cox.」：原本正看著電腦的Brother Cox走來頂上了Sister Cox的位置。
Sister Cox則是走到沙發前坐下看電視，總算是可以休息一下。打攪了他們那麼久，我都覺得不好意思了。
「You’ve written so much really good stuffs, young man.」：Brother Cox看著我的電腦笑說。
我不好意思地說：「I couldn’t have written any of this without Sister Cox.」
我和Brother Cox開始看著那小小的屏幕，研究起我的入學論文來。在Sister Cox的指導下，我已經寫出了一篇我畢生中寫過水平最高的英文文章，所以Brother Cox也沒有太多的意見，我們只是再小刪小改了一下。不知不覺間便過了二十分鐘……
「I’d not suggest you to mention the chances of tran…transferring to other schools. It gives people the impression that you’re just trying to get in and then get transfer out.」：Brother Cox最後說道。
「Well, indeed. You’re right.」：我驚醒過來，立即把那句句子刪掉。
「Then I think it’s almost perfect!」：Brother Cox笑說
「Okay!」：我興奮地把自己的論文上傳提交給校方。
「Thank you so much for your help!」坐了幾小時的我伸了個懶腰。
我伸懶腰時回頭一看，才發現Sister Cox原來早已在沙發上睡著了!看著滿頭白髮的Sister Cox為了我的入學論文而勞累了幾個小時，我頓時感到無比慚愧!
「I’m so so sorry that I’ve bothered you for such a long time, I’ll just hit the road real quick to let you and Sister Cox rest.」：我不好意思地說
不料Brother Cox卻會心一笑說：「No, it’s okay. It’s not about you, she does that all the time, even dur…during the day. After all, age doesn’t spare anyone.」
「Really? I feel so sorry.」：我慚愧道
「No, don’t be, Vergil. Take your time.」：Brother Cox一邊說，一邊走到Sister Cox那邊關掉電視，然後拉起旁邊的窗簾以防她著涼。
看著蒼老的Brother Cox的身影，我內心對他感到十分敬佩。他雖是為手在震顫著的柏金遜患者，但論愛護妻子及家人方面，他可是比無數身體正常的男人都要做得更好。我衷心希望自己將來能像他一樣對自己的妻兒充滿耐心和仁愛，當位出色的丈夫和父親。
Brother Cox走到我旁邊的茶几前拿起一瓶東西，說：「I have a very good friend who owns a bee farm in Miami. Every summer he flies all the way from Miami to Los Angeles to visit me with a bottle of honey from his best products.」
然後他提著兩杯蜜糖水回來，把其中一杯放在我面前，說道：「Good for your urethra, young man.」
「Thank you, sir.」：我感激道
我在茶餐廳喝過菊蜜、菜蜜和檸蜜等飲品，但我長這麼大從沒喝過真正天然且品質上好的蜂蜜呢。
Brother Cox舉起杯笑說：「Let’s have a toast!」
我拿起杯，笑問道：「To celebrate what?」
「To you having overcome all your problems successfully.」：Brother Cox鼓勵說
「Okay then, to success.」：我笑著喝了一口蜂蜜，這上好的蜂蜜果然比我以前喝過的嚐起來純得多了。
「I can’t believe all these good things are happening in my life, too good to be true,」我笑嘆道：「I mean, a few weeks ago, I was being tortured by the disease, got turned down by the church leader and felt like my life was a joke. And then you showed up! You changed the whole situation.」
Brother搖頭說：「Well, sir, I may have given you a little aid but the main reason why you could succeed is you. You fought like a lion to overcome all your problems. You earned it for yourself!」
我聽了Brother Cox的一席話後一時間說不出話。的確，Catherine說得很對，昔日的我或許是因為沒有經歷過傷風感冒以外的疾病，所以病魔一襲來時我束手無策，一下子就被他擊得情緒崩潰，在痛苦的掙扎中迷失了自我。
我沒有樂觀的心境，每天只想著自己有多凄慘，只看到自己有多可悲和可憐，因此才會覺得自己的人生沒有希望。其實就如全身鏡所反映的一樣，我自身的天賦和才華並沒有少，只有當我覺得自己很沒用時，我才是個沒用的人。
現在回頭一看，我都不敢相信自己居然已克服了那麼多的困難。
Brother Cox嘆道：「Speaking of success, what’s your definition of success?」
什麼是成功?真是個好問題，每個人對「成功」的定義都不同啊。
我想了想後答道：「As far as I’m concerned, success doesn’t have to be linked to money, power or other kinds of material stuffs. Everyone has a target, goal or fantasy. Even if it isn’t anything manificent or significant to the society, as long as he ultimately could achieve what he’s dreamt of, I’d consider him a successful person.」
「That’s a great answer to hear,」Brother Cox說道：「What’s your dream then?」
「I don’t wish to live under the spotlights or spend all my time chasing for money,」我笑嘆道：「The only one thing that I’ve been longing for since I was 16 is a chance to marry the girl I truly love, cherish her and build a happy family with her. That’s all I’ve ever wanted. That is also my definition for success.」
「Such a wonderful young man you are, I’m so proud of you,」Brother Cox問道：「So do you consider Albert Einstine a successful man?」
怎麼說到愛因斯坦了?我不明白Brother Cox的意思，笑問道：「What do you mean, sir? Who wouldn’t admit that Albert Einstine was the most successful quantum physics scientist that has ever lived?」
Brother Cox說道：「Of course, as a scientist for myself, I’m also astonished by what he had accomplished in physics and his contribution to the human race can’t be denied. However, I’d never want to be the same person as him.」
什麼?!Brother Cox是位名醫啊，我還是第一次聽到科學界的人如此不敬地評論愛因斯坦呢!
「He may have achieved things that no one could ever achieve in science, but so what?」Brother Cox說道：「If you also learn about what he had done to his wives and sons, you’d know he sucked at being a husband and father.」
「Speaking of success,」Brother Cox認真地看著我，說道：「There is no any kind of success that could compensate for failure in the home.」
Brother Cox指著我心臟的位置，說道：「No matter where you go, re…remember this sentence, keep the kind heart that you now have. I’m looking forward to seeing you get married with your dream girl one day.」
我點點頭，在心中也默念一次：「No success can compensate for failure in the home.」
我謹記住了，任何的成功都不能彌補家庭的失敗。
......
我成功完成了自己的入學論文，並提交了所有學校需要的文件，完成了大學申請手續。我亦得到了Brother Cox和他那位醫生朋友的幫助，身體的各種機能也漸回軌道。
除了Brother Cox外，我亦很感謝在短短的旅程中給我無限鼓勵的Vita，以及那位一直在我身旁信任我的可愛將軍澳女孩Catherine。
我像頭獅子般向命運抗爭，最後我取得了勝利，扼住了命運的咽喉!